I don’t know how to talk about what matters.

I don’t know how to talk about anything else.

I am afraid all the time

because I know what can be lost.

Because I have a good imagination

& know my history,

I know what is at risk.

I want to say:

even though I understand

there is great pain and loss

yet to be experienced

& even though the weight of the

pain of the world rewires me

I love this world

I want to be here

& I am so sad.